|
|
|
|
my free text in the red field
|
|
|
|
|
|
24.2.05
40-LOOKED DEATH IN HIS EYES there were simply three more days to stand in that location. i went step by step trying to get out in the most behavable manner ever remarked.
7:21 PM
21.2.05
39-i still consider it burdensome writing here. but i find no other way to express myself. the situation on the place that has no name has developed in the most agonic way. first in november tussnelda passed away. 2 months later princess left. familyman became more and more burdensome; a practicioner became important but is quite cool. i've always had good feeling with 'capo' but 6 days ago we had our final talk about my dismission - since then there is no more telepathic connection between the 2 of us. in the meantime i try to get other women that i know into this job. he will get a cheaper person for more hours, maybe their feeling to each other will be better. there are still 21 more days to survive: 5 weeks with 3 holidays. i am not in a hurry finding a new employment but i consider it exciting writing applications and even attending application talks. but there is one thing that i cannot image: having to be somewhere at eight, wearing a classical costume. i could be so casual there and i must find a comparable situation again. i have stopped my ordinary log cause mum did read it. i will continue writing here - maybe not in the very best english but in the kind of english that strictly and intuitively comes to my mind and runs thru' my fingers like black blood.
8:10 PM
|
|
|
|
|